A Stutter is your Friend

[warrick]

I recently read a great book by Bob G. Bodenhammer, DMin called Mastering Blocking and Stuttering. I picked up a lot of great stuff from this book and may share more in further posts, but the one I want to discuss today is the idea that a stutter is like a misguided friend. And it only has the best intentions but its method of execution is not the best.

He states that in his experience, people stutter for all sorts of reasons and in all sorts of situations, but in each case, there is a positive intent towards the stutter. This belief really got me thinking and personally I agree with him, and even though I might not have admitted it at first, in a way I think I have always known.

For me, my stutter keeps me safe. I am always so fearful of saying silly things and was often given funny looks for a lot of my thoughtless comments. My stutter is my minds way of holding me back from a comment that I have not given due consideration and I am not fully commited to.

What is your stutter trying to do for you?

Warrick

[Jason]

I see myself as a competitor in a 3 legged race.

My stutter is tied to me at the ankle and we are currently in a running race trying to keep up with people jogging along without a partner.

If I fight it or pretend the stutter isn't attached to me then we lose the rythem and thus fall over.

If I help myself and put an arm around my stutter to steady it then we can run quite freely.

If I am nervous, stressed or really relaxed, I lose my grip steadying my stutter, I get twichy and I make us fall over.

I like this metaphor and I think it almost perfectly describes the relationship between me and my stammer.

[warrick]

I like your metaphor. I also like the way you see your stutter as something separate to yourself. A lot of people tie their identity to their stutter rather than just something that they do. By allowing a stutter to become your identity, it means that a person sees a failure in a speeking situation to mean that they themselves are a failure, which in turn will affect every aspect of their lives, not just speaking. A stutter needs to be recognised as a behaviour, not an identity.

Anyway, great metaphor. :)

[Jason]

I agree with you completely. A stutter can easily consume your life, however at the end of the day it is a behavior. A very complex one but one you can change and affect through a variety of different methods.

The main problem with the stutter is its manifestation which seems to suggest that it is some sort of physical ailment. The more you attempt to force a word the worse it gets. This is why I think many people that stutter have such a problem. When you are in trouble the normal reaction is to struggle against it.

If you are ill you fight the illness. If you are cornered then you will fight your way out. However this approach doesn't work in the way you would think with a stutter. With a stutter the battle is very much a mental struggle instead of a physical one. It took me a very long to realize this.

This is why I think the 3 legged race is a good metaphor. It takes a lot of concentration to actually run the same way as someone else. In my eyes this is the only real way to move forward with a stammer.

Think before you speak.
When you block, think about introducing sound.
Be aware of when you feel a block coming and thus slide into it with a prolongation.
Think about your breathing and when you should speak on the breath.
Think about the sound of the syllable you are trying to say.

All of this is concentration and thinking. In doing this you are able to react better and with time speak more fluently as well.