Hey everyone

[mohito445]

Hey there,

I just joined this forum.I'd like to believe that I'm a mild stutterer since I only get stuck on certain words.These words mostly begin with the letters M,N and P.People tell me that I speak fluently but then these words really kill me when I have to say them.I first stuttered when I was 14 or 15.It was when my teacher asked me my name in class and I got stuck on it.It was embarrassing but I lived with it.Then there have been times when my speech was flawless which made me believe that my stuttering has gone.But it hasn't.When I analyze my condition I realize that I stutter when I get conscious.It could be the surroundings, the people around me or even if something is bothering me.When I was young, my family moved around a lot.In the last 20 years I have lived in 6-7 different cities.I'm not sure if this is the reason because I have a younger brother who doesn't stutter at all.Another thing that I keep wondering about is whether my condition has anything to do with me being a professional athlete.A friend of mine who works as a counselor told me that many athletes come to her with problems such as dyslexia and speech disorders.

At times I don't know what to believe.Am I a victim of stuttering or not? I worked hard to get into one of the best B-schools in the country for which I had several interviews and group discussions.I did really well in them and not once did I stutter.I'm in the b-school now and I have started stuttering more than often.I'm a little dejected and wish I could be what I was 6 months back.One thing I have noticed is that I stutter more when I think of the fact that I'm going to stutter or about the words that I get stuck on.I don't stutter at all when I'm with my close friends but with strangers I do.

I didn't exactly have a troubled childhood but I have always been a rebel and as a result of this I had a lot of bitter arguments with my parents which would leave me frustrated.I'm not sure if this is a reason for my stuttering either.

Anyway, now that I'm part of this forum I look forward to learn a lot more about stuttering.If anyone has any views/suggestions on anything I wrote above, please reply.

Thank you.

[Jason]

Hello mohito,

Welcome. I understand what you mean by being 'conscious' of what is around you. I really have 2 modes of speaking. I have 'the fluency'. This is where I get lost in what I am talking about and generally am stutter free. I feel confident about my words and what I am talking about.

My second mode of speech has to be 'stuttering'. I notice that when I stutter several things are going on around me

-> The person may be busy doing something else.
---- When this happens I am not sure if they can hear me, I get distracted and stutter.

-> Background Sounds
---- Especially on the phone, I find it really hard to stay fluent if I can hear something in the background

-> Strangers

I could go on but the point is that my stutter at least really is dependent about me being comfortable in my surroundings and hitting 'the zone' where I am just fluent. Do you find this is what is happening with you?

At the moment I am working on increasing this comfort zone :)

[mohito445]

Hey Jason,
You just spoke my mind.I feel exactly the same.I tend to get distracted when I'm in a crowd or talking to a group of people.The same is true with background noises on a phone call.My mind tries to tell me that the people who I'm talking to cannot hear me.And when I think of the words that I get stuck on, things kinda get messed up.It's quite frustrating but I know I can overcome it.

What exactly are you doing to increase your 'zone'? Could you gimme a few tips please.

Thanks.:)

[Jason]

To increase my comfort zone I am just pulling out the finger. When I notice that I am starting feel nervous I force myself to speak. When a phone rings I try to be the first person to pick it up. I don't want to get the phone but thats why I go for it. To conquer such negative thoughts.

I am integrating with my new house mates, I am forcing myself to get out there and speak. Even if I don't enjoy it I know in the long term it will help. Its been 3 weeks now, I am feeling more and more confident every day. I just need to keep forcing myself to face these uncomfortable situations.

Recently it has occured to me that stuttering is more about bravery than anything else :)